Building Trust with Brené Brown’s BRAVING Model: A Guide to Stronger Connections
Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship. Yet, building and maintaining trust can feel elusive, especially when past experiences or misunderstandings get in the way. Brené Brown, renowned researcher and storyteller, offers a powerful framework for understanding trust through her BRAVING model. Each letter in BRAVING represents a key component of trust, providing a practical guide to strengthen your connections with others—and yourself.
What Is the BRAVING Model?
Brené Brown describes trust as being built incrementally through small actions. The BRAVING model breaks trust into seven key elements:
- Boundaries
- Reliability
- Accountability
- Vault
- Integrity
- Nonjudgment
- Generosity
Let’s dive into each element and explore how they shape the way we build and maintain trust.
1. Boundaries: Respecting Limits
Healthy relationships require clear and respected boundaries. Setting boundaries isn’t about shutting people out; it’s about creating guidelines that protect your emotional and physical well-being.
When you communicate your boundaries with clarity and kindness, you show others how to treat you. Likewise, respecting others’ boundaries demonstrates that you value their comfort and autonomy. For example, saying, “I need time to recharge after work before I can catch up,” sets a healthy expectation without guilt.
2. Reliability: Following Through
Trust grows when actions match words. Reliability means doing what you say you’ll do, consistently.
In relationships, reliability can look like showing up on time, keeping commitments, or being dependable during tough times. It’s not about being perfect—it’s about being consistent. Small, repeated acts of follow-through build a foundation of trust over time.
3. Accountability: Owning Your Actions
Accountability is the willingness to own your mistakes, apologize, and make amends. It requires humility and courage to acknowledge when you’ve fallen short.
For instance, if you miss an important event, taking responsibility might sound like, “I’m so sorry I let you down. I value our relationship, and I’ll make sure this doesn’t happen again.”
By modeling accountability, you encourage others to do the same, creating a relationship dynamic rooted in mutual respect and growth.
4. Vault: Protecting Confidentiality
Trust thrives in spaces where vulnerability is safe. The “vault” refers to keeping shared information confidential. Gossiping or breaking confidence erodes trust, even if you’re not directly involved.
For example, if a friend shares something personal, honor their trust by keeping it private. Similarly, avoid sharing others’ secrets to build credibility in your relationships.
5. Integrity: Practicing Your Values
Integrity means choosing courage over comfort and doing what’s right, even when it’s hard. It’s about aligning your actions with your values, even when no one is watching.
Living with integrity builds trust because it shows others that your words and actions are grounded in authenticity. When you say, “I believe in fairness,” and follow through by standing up for others, you demonstrate integrity in action.
6. Nonjudgment: Creating a Safe Space
Trust deepens when people feel they can show up as their full selves without fear of judgment. Nonjudgment requires listening with empathy and supporting others without offering unsolicited advice.
In practice, this might mean saying, “I’m here to listen,” when a loved one shares a struggle, rather than rushing to fix the problem. It also means giving yourself the same grace—allowing self-compassion to replace harsh self-criticism.
7. Generosity: Assuming Positive Intent
Generosity in the BRAVING model means extending the most generous interpretation of others’ words and actions. Instead of jumping to conclusions, it asks us to assume positive intent.
For example, if a partner forgets an important date, instead of assuming they don’t care, you might think, They must be overwhelmed right now. Generosity fosters trust by encouraging understanding and compassion, even in challenging moments.
Building Trust Within Yourself
While the BRAVING model helps us build trust with others, it also highlights the importance of self-trust. Trusting yourself involves setting boundaries, honoring your commitments, and treating yourself with compassion and integrity.
For instance, if you constantly overcommit, it’s hard to trust yourself to follow through. By setting realistic goals and following the BRAVING principles in your relationship with yourself, you create a stronger foundation for all your connections.
Applying BRAVING in Relationships
The BRAVING model isn’t a one-time checklist—it’s a guide to ongoing trust-building. Whether you’re repairing a strained relationship or strengthening an already solid one, using BRAVING as a framework fosters clarity and connection.
Try this exercise with a partner or loved one:
- Discuss each BRAVING element together.
- Identify areas where trust feels strong and areas where it could grow.
- Set one small, actionable goal to enhance trust in your relationship.
Final Thoughts: Trust Is Built Brick by Brick
Trust isn’t about grand gestures—it’s about small, consistent actions that say, “I see you, I value you, and I honor our connection.” By embracing the BRAVING model, you can cultivate trust in ways that feel intentional and meaningful.
Whether you’re working on trust in your relationship, friendships, or with yourself, remember: it’s a journey, not a destination. And every step you take brings you closer to deeper, more fulfilling connections.
If you’d like support building trust in your relationships, I’m here to help. Let’s explore how these principles can guide you toward stronger, more connected partnerships. Visit my Let’s Connect page to schedule a consultation today.