This post is going to sound more personal than others I’ve shared because I’m writing it as much for myself as for you. As a therapist, this time feels similar to the early days of the pandemic, where I’m just as “in it” as my clients are, and my main goal is to sit with these tough emotions together. So here, through my own tears (literally), are some thoughts I hope can offer a bit of solace amidst the emotions post-election.

Feel All the Feels

First and foremost, give yourself permission to feel. Emotions are valid, and they’re a natural response to turmoil, especially after elections. Suppressing feelings of grief or anger can often lead to deeper struggles down the road. Although we’re wired to avoid pain, there’s another part of us that can choose differently. Rather than running from these tough feelings, we can lean into them. Not sure how to start? Here’s a brief guide that might help you navigate this process, though it fairly wordy. Frankly, this one is as well.

And watch out for a common pitfall: escapism. Using substances, seeking distractions through hookups, or filling carts with online buys we don’t need—these quick dopamine hits might seem tempting, but they only pause the real work of processing. Real growth comes through feeling, not fleeing.

What Can We Do About It? (Short Term)

As a therapist, I’m all about growth and personal development, but in times of emotional crisis, like now after the election results, our resources need to shift. Crisis calls for the basics, not necessarily growth. Now isn’t the time for deep “how” and “why” questions; instead, let’s focus on caring for ourselves. Nourish your body with good food and movement, prioritize sleep, connect with those closest to you, engage in your community, and meet your basic need for touch.

Movement, for instance, is a powerful way to manage stress and regulate the nervous system. Physical activity—whether a brisk walk, stretching, or more intense exercise—releases endorphins, those natural mood-boosters that counteract stress hormones like cortisol. Movement also signals the body that it’s safe to release tension, helping us find a sense of calm in the present moment.

Sleep hygiene also plays a huge role. A consistent bedtime, avoiding caffeine or heavy meals late in the day, and creating a quiet, dark sleeping space all help signal that it’s time to unwind. Reducing screen time an hour before bed and engaging in relaxing activities like reading can make a real difference. Quality sleep builds resilience, improving mood, focus, and our overall ability to manage stress.

Connect with Your Community

There’s so much grief surrounding these election results. Every culture has rituals around food, dance, health, healing, and processing grief. And what’s true across humanity is that grief isn’t meant to be handled alone. Isolation compounds our struggles. Reach out to friends, family, or support groups; sharing your feelings creates belonging and reminds you that you’re not alone in this journey. Group discussions are incredibly healing, providing a space to voice fears and frustrations while receiving the understanding of others who share your experiences.

For those with partners, I encourage you to open up to them about your feelings. This can be challenging if you’re worried it won’t go well, but consider telling your partner you just need them to listen with empathy. Partners can also help meet our basic need for touch.

Touch itself plays a powerful role in helping us process emotions and regulate the nervous system. Whether it’s a comforting hug, holding hands, or a pat on the back, touch releases oxytocin—the “bonding hormone”—which calms our nervous system and fosters feelings of safety in times of strong emotions like post-election periods. By bringing us into the present, touch makes managing intense emotions a bit easier, helping us move through difficult feelings with a deeper sense of connection and support.

If you’re single, there are ways to meet your basic need for touch through other means. Self-touch practices, like gently massaging your shoulders or hands, release tension and provide comfort. Physical activities like yoga, dance, and stretching stimulate touch receptors, grounding and calming us. Pets also offer affectionate touch; cuddling and petting them is comforting and judgment-free. Therapeutic touch from massage therapy can be a safe, structured way to experience touch as well. Each of these options helps satisfy the human need for touch and enhances well-being.

What Do We Do About It? (Longer Term)

For us homos, election results carry profound implications. Political outcomes that threaten our rights or reinforce stigma can feel deeply personal, evoking overwhelming anger and grief. It’s tough to handle emotions post-election, but turning those emotions into political action can provide a sense of control. Joining queer advocacy groups, engaging in grassroots organizing, or supporting queer-friendly legislation channels those emotions into a meaningful purpose. This transforms pain into purpose, reminding us that we’re not powerless but part of a resilient, active community with a legacy of courage and resistance.

Taking action reframes personal pain as part of a larger movement—one that has weathered adversity time and again. Engaging in political advocacy brings people together, connecting us with others who share our experiences and our determination for a safer world. This sense of shared purpose builds resilience and empowerment, fueling LGBTQ+ individuals to endure challenges as a united front. Our actions contribute to a legacy of advocacy, protecting each other and pushing for progress—a reminder of our collective strength and courage.

One More Thing

Lastly, I want you to know that I (and other therapists) am here for you. We may be “in it” with you, but we’re committed to supporting you through this. This is my life’s work: walking alongside you as you process stress, overwhelm, fear, and the big existential questions that naturally arise post-election. Don’t hesitate to reach out; allow yourself to be supported.